Last week I fell in love with a French girl

And she has fallen out of love with me already this week. That is the gist of this story.

The worst of it is that it is only Monday. Had I been able to make it through to Wednesday or Thursday then I would have been quite pleased with myself. But as it is, I feel like a piece of half-chewed gum that has been prematurely spat out onto a busy street. I thought there was still some flavour there, but as it is I am very soon going to be attached to the bottom of someone's shoe.

I enjoyed it while it lasted. I think I learnt quite a lot of French last week. At least more than I have been taught in French lessons for the last 6 months. There is something about an attractive girl that focusses the mind like no amount of classroom work or mp3 listening can compete with. I thought I would be fluent within a month. Not so likely now. It seemed to be going too well last week, chatting on the bus and meeting up for tea. We were texting every five minutes and I was even a bit distracted from my work. Then things started to cool at the weekend as she did that annoying "let's just be friends" thing. Today there was almost zero flirting which was like the final twist of the dagger.

So after taking ten months to find a French girl, I am now completely unconvinced that I want to have anything to do with any others. I want to warn you guys, they are beautiful, but underneath they are rude, presumptuous, unpredictable and they smoke too much. My advice, stay at home with a pain au chocolate and a good cup of Her Majesty's finest tea.